Mom's Mosiac

Mom's Mosiac

Monday, March 14, 2011


This was a speech made by Pulitzer Prize-winning author, Anna Quintile
at the graduation ceremony of an American university where she was
awarded an Honorary PhD.

"I'm a novelist. My work is human nature. Real life is all I know.

Don't ever confuse the two; your life and your work. You will walk out of here this afternoon with only one thing that no one else has. There will be hundreds of people out there with your same degree: there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living.

But you will be the only person alive who has sole custody of your life. Your particular life. Your entire life. Not just your life at a desk or your life on a bus or in a car or at the computer. Not just the life of your mind, but the life of your heart. Not just your bank accounts but also your soul.

People don't talk about the soul very much anymore. It's so much easier to write a resume than to craft a spirit. But a resume is cold comfort on a winter's night, or when you're sad, or broke, or lonely, or when you've received your test results and they're not so good.

Here is my resume: I am a good mother to three children.

I have tried never to let my work stand in the way of being a good parent. I no longer consider myself the centre of the universe. I show up. I listen. I try to laugh. I am a good friend to my husband. I have tried to make marriage vows mean what they say. I am a good friend to my friends and them to me. Without them, there would be nothing to say to you today, because I would be a cardboard cut out. But I call them on the phone and I meet them for lunch. I would be rotten, at best mediocre, at my job if those other things were not true.

You cannot be really first rate at your work if your work is all you are. So here's what I wanted to tell you today:

Get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger pay cheque, the larger house. Do you think you'd care so very much about those things if you blew an aneurysm one afternoon or found a lump in your breast?

Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze at the seaside, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over the water, or the way a baby scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a sweet with her thumb and first finger.

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. And remember that love is not leisure, it is work. Pick up the phone. Send an email. Write a letter. Get a life in which you are generous. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you have no business taking it for granted.

Care so deeply about its goodness that you want to spread it around. Take money you would have spent on beer and give it to charity. Work in a soup kitchen. Be a big brother or sister. All of you want to do well. But if you do not do good too, then doing well will never be enough.

It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, and our minutes.  It is so easy to take for granted the colour of our kids' eyes, the way the melody in a symphony rises and falls and disappears and rises again.

It is so easy to exist instead of to live.

I learned to live many years ago. I learned to love the journey, not the destination.
I learned that it is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get.
I learned to look at all the good in the world and try to give some of it back because I believed in it, completely and utterly.

And I tried to do that, in part, by telling others what I had learned. By telling them this: Consider the lilies of the field. Look at the fuzz on a baby's ear.

Read in the back yard with the sun on your face.

Learn to be happy. And think of life as a terminal illness, because if you do, you will live it with joy and passion as it ought to be lived".


Maybe it has something to do with the tremendous human tragedy in Japan.  The sheer horror of the images on TV ... Last week this time, their lives were 'business as usual'; just like ours are today.  I feel profoundly changed by what has confronted us since last friday, the 11th March, 2011.

At the same time, this little speech by Anna Quintile also touched me deeply when I read it this morning.  It showed me my failures ... and made me want to do better.  I always say this ... "God is in the details!"  I always try to fill the tiny details of my life with all the things Anna has mentioned.  But in spite of my most valiant efforts I often fail.  It's not so easy swimming against the tide every second of every day.  The tide of constant demands and pressures.  There will inevitably be failures because, apart from our own weaknesses, we are affected by other people's choices.  The more people in your life, the more choices there are, that affect you. 

Nevertheless, and in spite of all ... I resolve to do better today - and for the rest of my tomorrows!

See you soon.


  1. This is wonderful Thea; thank you for posting it!
    yes, Japan's situation has sat heavily on my heart too... what is important for each day and for eternity...certainly not exalting self, but making a difference in someone's life no matter how small...for Jesus

  2. This blog really 'spoke to me' like you Thea I resolve to do better today & all my tomorrows thank you for sharing this with me. today I was moaning about the rain,rain & more rain, then I remembered Japan, what right do I have to moan, I have a roof over my head food in the cupboard, I just had to thank the Lord for His goodness to me. Have a good tomorrow

    Anne xxx

  3. a poem by Joy Bjorn:

    Earth and hell arrayed against,
    Intent to overwhelm.
    Yet back of earthquake, wind and fire,
    The still small voice of Calm.
    Be still and know that I am God,
    ...In sheltering Rock take rest,
    My mighty hand is shielding,
    I Am working out the best.
    My grace sufficient in distress,
    My strength perfect in weakness,
    Glad be in all reproaches, needs:
    Christ's power in grateful meekness.